It's a Concert not a Concerto

I’ve written about Wilco, and hence Jeff Tweedy indirectly, before. So if you don’t like it why are you here? Yes, I’m going to write about Jeff Tweedy again.

I went to see Jeff Tweedy play a solo show in Montreal at L’Olympia. Just Jeff Tweedy and 6 or so acoustic guitars. It was seated (read shitty) but there was a bar (read double Jim Beams). So we proceeded to drink our way through the opening act, at the bar, and waited for the headliner. We were seated well enough in advance that we didn’t disturb the precious Mr. Tweedy.

Before I go on, a bit of historical perspective. Jeff Tweedy is well known as a curmudgeon (I know). In the past, he was quite acerbic about it (read when he was on painkillers) but now sort of comes across as funny. I say sort of because you always wonder if there’s a bit of F-You in there (there likely is). I read a review of the previous night’s show in Toronto and someone from the crowd yelled “turn it to 11!” Jeff Tweedy looks at his acoustic guitars and says “I don’t have anything that goes to 11.” Pretty funny, but you know he was thinking “screw you pal” on the inside.

So, knowing this, I was tempted all night to start some witty banter (read double Jim Beam) with Mr. Tweedy. Luckily, I refrained. However, he did play one of my favourite songs (I don’t recall which – double Jim Beam) and at one point I started clapping. Again, this is a concert, with people whooping, hollering and the like. At one point during the song, others joined me in clapping. I can keep time, trust me, I paid for the lessons to learn how to keep time. But I got bored pretty quickly, as I am wont to do, and grabbed my drink and stopped clapping. The song ends and Jeff Tweedy says “I’d like to thank…” and in my head the sentence concludes with “…Mr. Mills for joining me on this song as my percussionist.” Rather the sentence ended “…whoever got that guy to stop clapping, it was distracting.”

Come ON! It’s a concert and I clapped. Heaven forbid I have some fun at a show. At least, Mr. Tweedy, you didn’t get Jim Beam spilled on you like the guy, um, nowhere near me.

Customer Dissatisfaction

There's a music shop in Ottawa that I've always despised. The first reason was its location (it's on Rideau street and hard to get to). The second reason is the service. When I first started to visit the guys wouldn't even look at me. They'd pander to the regulars and professional musicians. Fair enough. But then I got older and had some money to burn. As soon as I had money to burn they were helpful, until I had to take said thing back.

Case #1 - The Tele

I didn't return my Telecaster. I never would. But when I bought it I was told to take it in sometime in the first six months for a full tune up as the intonation and other shit I didn't know shit about would need to be adjusted. Fair enough.

So I learned about intonation and shit and one day noticed the strings rattled and didn't before. So I took it in for the free tune up. They told me it would be ready in two days and I said, "I'm out of town until next Saturday, so I'll just pick it up then." Next Saturday being a week away.

Next Saturday arrives and I show up at the store. "Sorry sir, your guitar isn't ready." OK, I'm somewhat upset, but shit happens.

"Can I have it for Thursday? That's the next jam."

"Sure."

Thursday arrives. I call at noon to make sure I can pick it up at 6. "Is she ready?"

"No, but we'll have it ready by six."

I arrive at six and they can't find it. They scurry and scrounge and I look behind the counter and say, "that's it, did you fix it?"

"Yep, sure did."

"Can I try it?" I ask, recalling the 6th string rattle.

"Sure."

"It wasn't fixed." I say.

"Hey (insert name here), did you fix the black Tele?" the guy yells to the back.

No is the response from the distance. So they fix it there while I wait, which begs the question, couldn't they have done that the first time I was there?

Case #2 - The Recorder (no, not that kind of recorder)

We record some songs we play. We have this dual input thing that plugs into a Mac (half the problem) via USB. This means that we have to play the song 3 times to get all tracks recorded. Which is fine, I think professionals even do this, but it's time consuming.

A couple of days after the holidays I'm surfing this store's website, partly because I'm a sucker for punishment, but mainly because a cute girl said she wanted a guitar. Anyway, I see this recording device similar to ours except it has 8 inputs. 8! Perfect! I call the store and they have one in stock. I ask them to hold it and they do.

Saturday arrives and I head down to the store. My machine is waiting, but I'm nervous, it's so inexpensive, like beer at a Legion. "Are you sure this will work?" I ask, "And if not, can I take it back?"

"Yes" he says.

So I cancel drinking plans with football buddies. Wait, I move my drinking plans from my football buddies to my band buddies and head to the jam space to figure it out. We can't. But we're not worried, we're smart guys, we'll figure it out.

Fast forward to next week and after finally reading the instructions, it works. Woohoo, let's go grab a drink.

Fast forward to next jam night and we can't get it to work. Fast forward to next jam night and we still can't get it to work. We then test it out direct to amplifiers and it doesn't work. So I check the receipt, it's within 30 days and I take it back.

I talk to a guy at the counter and tell him my problem and he says, "we don't have another one in stock."

"That's fine," I say, "I didn't want another one anyway, I just want my money back."

"We don't give money back." he says.

"What? Why? It's within 30 days." I say.

"Well, that'd be just like renting. Nobody gives money back like that."

"Are you serious?" I say, "Everybody gives money back."

"...."

"Everybody."

"Well, I guess we don't, but you can have store credit."

"Fine, I'm missing Lucky Ron. Gimme the credit."

So now I have store credit at a store I don't want to visit. It's about $250, exactly the price I'd pay to fill that thing full of shotgun pellets.

Failure to Launch

A giant Ipod touch with a data plan or a giant Iphone with no phone. That's what Apple unveiled as their tablet, the Ipad. Ignoring the obvious, and already trying too hard jokes, about the name, Apple underwhelmed me and others today.

Gizmodo has a great post about the disappointments with the Ipad's capabilities. My buddy G had a great blog post about Apple potentially missing the boat (and they did) with the Ipad's functionality. It appears to me that Apple is happy producing an entertainment device. I won't go into detail as you can read Gizmodo's post or G's post for the details. But what gets me is Apple's apparent ignorance (hubris perhaps) to what it needs to fix with respect to its handheld system; multitasking.

You can say what you will about a physical vs touch keyboard or a typical OS file structure, I don't see either as an issue with respect to the Iphone or Ipad. You can get used to the touch keyboard and I actually prefer the lack of a visible folder structure (you don't see folders, you just access the files needed through an app's gui). But the lack of multitasking is beyond me, especially with the Ipad.

I assume that Apple's main competition here are net books; small, media focused laptops. You can multitask on net books, search the net while playing a game or writing an email. If you've paid attention you've heard the lack of multitasking gripe from Apple devotees and Apple haters alike. Yet Apple has seemingly ignored the issue. This is a functionality that should be commonplace on any computing device, even smart phones (as I type this on my Blackberry I switch with ease without saving or closing my memo application to check email, scores, twitter and other applications that are running concurrently).

It reminds me of an issue with Itunes. I've heard many Apple devotees state the reason the Ipod is king of the MP3 players is the ease of use and functionality of Itunes. I disagree. While Itunes is not difficult to use, it's not the simplest media management tool and lacks an important feature that other media management software have; the ability to monitor folders and automatically add new files to its library. The idea seems so simple and mandatory, yet it is nonexistent in Itunes.

Apple is a great manufacturer of entertainment devices, I love my Ipod and would rather have an Iphone than my Blackberry, but they could be better and if they didn't have the hip cachet they wouldn't be doing as well as they are. There are better MP3 players, better smartphones, better software, and better computing devices available for better prices. At some point they'll be forced to pay attention and give us what we need.

Also, check out G's new post at the Luddite Times. He properly spells Apple's iLine of products and is an Apple devotee who isn't sold.

RIP Jay Reatard

Jay Reatard's show was short and sparse. He may have played for a total of 30 or 45 minutes but they were the greatest 30 or 45 minutes I've ever spent at the Babylon night club. I don't recall him saying a word between songs but I do recall the vigor with which he strummed the chords to My Shadow and his long, curly red hair flying around violently.

Jay Reatard died earlier this week and many of you don't know who he is. Who he was was one of North America best young punk rockers. And by punk, this is what I mean:

If you are unfamiliar with the incident or the widely circulated YouTube video that came out afterward, the story goes something like this: Reatard (real name Jay Lindsey) hit the stage at Toronto's Silver Dollar at about 11 p.m. He and his band were in the middle of their fourth song when one audience member sauntered on stage and managed to disconnect Reatard's microphone. Reatard swung the concert goer around by the shirt and landed a punch square in the young man's face. Then he promptly packed up his things and walked out of the venue.

Apparently Jay didn't fuck around. I recall someone mentioning that he looked a bit like Carrot Top and I suddenly expected that person to end up with a fist or boot in the face. Sadly I was disappointed.

If you haven't heard Jay's music you should. I recently read he was on the cusp of greatness. Bullshit. He was great. The fact that the rest of the world didn't know it yet changes nothing.

Music Snobbery Part 1 – I Believe in Country Music

This is the first part in a continuing curmudgeon series, Music Snobbery. I’m a self-professed recovering music snob. You all know music snobs. They’re (we’re?) the ones who says things like “I don’t listen to the radio”, “Metallica was shit after And Justice For All”, “I like the Silversun Pickups better when they were called Zwan” (Hi G) and the like. Today I’m examining the music snob who says “I like all kinds of music, except country.”

In Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs – A Low Culture Manifesto, Chuck Klosterman posits that music taste is used by the music snob to gauge coolness. In particular, most people who say “I like all kinds of music, except country” only say so to appear cool. I agree with Chuck; people judge other people’s cool factor by what they listen to. This is increasing measured by what’s on their Ipod (heaven fordid you have a Zune).

These folks always pick out country. You never hear anyone say “I like all kinds of music except show tunes” or “I like all kinds of music, except chamber music” or how about “I like all kinds of music, except Gregorian chants.” No, people love to pick on country music.

Well reader, I love country music. I grew up listening to it and I hear it in a lot of music that all the hipsters listen to, like:

• Wilco (big Ernest Tubbs fans)
• Neko Case
• Okkervil River
• Avett Brothers (these guys are as country as they come)
• Tallest Man on Earth
• Fleet Foxes
• X
• Lykke Li (ok, kidding here)

I don’t want to convince you to like country music, in fact a friend of mine once said “everybody has their own ears” and I agree with him. You can like and dislike whatever you want, just don’t be a snob about it.